Esther Perel went around the globe asking couples “When are you most drawn to your partner?” And then what she found across the world, everyone said pretty much the same thing, that they found their partner the most attractive when they were able to see their partner as a self sustaining entity; when they were able to perceive their partner the way other people perceived them, when they were able to distance themselves from them and see them as a complete individual and not their other half.
She brings out the idea that attraction and desire may require a sort of distance, a creation of space. I think this is brilliant to say the least. Especially for anyone who has loved and gone past the honeymoon period and has experienced the draining and tiring reality of the routine of spending every single day with someone losing passion by the minute.
This TED talk by Esther, is spot on, on the reasons why we sometimes lose desire for the one we love, and how we can incorporate this information into our own relationships.